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Alba Iulia
Sunday, August 16, 2020

Love hurts

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Lorna Ramirez
Lorna Ramirez
LORNA RAMIREZ was born, raised and educated in Manila in the Philippines, attaining a degree in Chemical Engineering and working as a laboratory manager in a textiles company. In 1977, with her husband and her son and daughter she migrated to Australia. She worked as a laboratory technician and a chemist in Australia, only retiring in the year 2000 to care for her first grandchild. Lorna Ramirez has travelled extensively, gaining much from her interactions with people all over the world and building a strong foundation for her philosophies about life. She loves gardening, cooking, and reading and playing the piano. She is also interested in the Stock Exchange. Throughout her life, Lorna Ramirez, a woman of faith, has been a wise observer of human behaviour and has collected her many pearls of wisdom and observations to produce this inspiring and uplifting book.

“You always hurt the one you love, the one you should not hurt at all”. This is the opening of the song Hurt, a song popularised by Timi Yuro, a soul singer of the 60s era. 

This is one of my favourite songs of all time. This song encapsulated what love is, and how we are sensitive when loving someone with all our heart.

Why do we get hurt easily once we love someone? 

There are so many answers to this question. However, in my opinion one of the main reasons for this is that we are so emotionally attached to the person we adore and expectation from someone we love is at its highest level. 

Even frivolous words and actions by loved ones can hurt us. Indeed, we can be too sensitive and at times overreact for no reason at all.

Why is it when egregious behaviour is manifested by loved ones, we easily react to their emotions but cannot tolerate others for doing so? Because we care and always protect those we love. 

People in love usually have an inexorable attitude. They won’t be persuaded and usually blinded by the truth. Love is so potent it can change a person. It makes a strong man cry and a weak man strong. 

Love can destroy families and friends and even divide nations. It can strike you anytime, anywhere without warning. Such a mystical power of love.

Loving is not easy, it has its perils. However, one can also experience the joy, happiness, contentment and inspiration of a person truly in love. Love can also kill. One can die of a broken heart, called a broken heart syndrome. Women are more prone than men to experience this kind of syndrome. Even in the animal kingdom, we can witness this kind of syndrome. 

A good example is my rabbit. Two baby rabbits were given to us by my grandchildren last Christmas in 2018. We cared and nurtured both of them. We named them Aly and Amy, and after six months Aly was able to dig a hole and free herself. We never found her. 

Amy had shown a sign of depression missing her companion rabbit. She did not eat for two days and we became worried. We gave Amy attention and tender loving care by feeding her manually. Fortunately, she responded and got back to normal.

There are those who can’t move on, especially a mother losing her child. The love of a mother to her children is beyond measure and hard to fathom. My friend in America lost her only child. She did not recover from the tragedy. She succumbed to depression until her husband left him which led her to take her own life. 

Love is beyond comprehension, no one will find the answers to how and why we fall in love. It is really a mystery beyond the concept of science.

As the ending of the lyrics of the song Hurt says, ”So if I broke your heart last night. It is because I love you most of all.” It’s your own way of saying sorry to your loved ones if you hurt them!

Happy Valentine’s Day to all

Excerpts from my book ‘Reflective Contemplations

Finding Love
Being in love we start to
Rediscover our inner self
And the real meaning of what life is all about
Finding love is magical
Moments and precious time
We shared with someone
We truly love and adore
Finding love is priceless

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